The VMI Show, 1974

VMI Pregame						9 November
			VERSION 3
Top Secret						page 1.

A: Ladies and Gentlemen -- Presenting the New and Improved Awardwinning
University of Virginia Pacifistic Cavaliers Indoor/Outdoor Precision? Marching
Pep Band and Chowder Society-Revue, Unlimited  -- Linwood Holton, Director
Emeritus; General Mills, Director; Henry Howell, Loyal Opposition; featuring
Johnny Walker as Drum Major; with security guard courtesy of La Cosa Nostra
Protective Agency, Inc.

	(Band lines up as usual in endzone; on signal, runs to straight line on ten-yard
line.  Drum major reviews the troops.  Band marches downfield, in single line, to
Bugler's Dream.)

A: In sharp contrast to the precision bands at other universities, the U.Va. Pep
Band prides itself on its ability to present an entertaining halftime show with
minimal preparation.  In fact, the band does not yet know what its first
formation is.  -- OK, Band, it's a locus of points equidistant form the drum
major.

Band: (in unison) WHAT!?

A: You know, a circle!

	Gunshot: Circle

A: The Pep Band now salutes the immortal words of choral director Robert Shaw,
who once said: "If people had three legs, all our waltzes would be marches."

	Music: The Blue Danube Waltz (Band waltz-marches in circle)
	Gunshot: Band forms Sigma Omega Tau

A: This being Openings Weekend, the Pep Band would be remiss in its duties if it
failed to salute all the Sigma Omega Taus in Fraternityland without whom this
weekend would be an exceedingly *dry affair*.

	Music: Rubgy Road
	Gunshot: Band forms Bunny Head

A: The Pep Band now salutes the citizens of Charlottesville and Albemarle County
for their overwhelming rejection this past week of the Sunday Blue Laws.  The
Band notes with amusement that it was previously unable to purchase music and
instruments on Sunday, but chose not to object since it *could* buy its other
necessities -- Pabst and Playboy.

	Music: Never on Sunday
	GUnshot: Band forms Huddled Mass

A: Through the electronic miracle of Instant Replay, the Pep Band is pleased as
punch to recreate its hit formation from last weeks' show -- In this age of
educational turmoil, we urge our leadership to maintain eternal vigilance and
never lose sight of this University's most menacing danger -- C-R-E-E-P-I-N-G
S-T-A-T-E  U-i-s-m!!!!!!!

	Music: Chopin's Funeral March

	(3 drum cadences; form field block center and play "Down the Field"; March down,
form 'HOOS, march back to center of field, then to side; gunshot at end: scramble
to endzone for massed bands playing of National Anthem.)

[Drum major dressed in kilts; security guards carried scottish sabers and
bagpipes.]