ShowCo Chairs: James Maxwell (CLAS ’04) and Jim Apple (CLAS ’03)
FSU Tailgate (Crafted from rejected jokes)
Look in the sky! Cheesier than Kraft Cheese and Macaroni, more exciting than Maragret Thatcher naked on a cold day, with more head than your average pint of Guinness, iiiit’s the Award Winning Virginia Fighting Cavalier Indoor/Outdoor Precision Marching Pep Band and Chowder Society Review, Unlimited!!!
You’re listening to the smooth sounds of the one, the only Award Winning Virginia Fighting Cavalier Indoor/Outdoor Precision Marching Pep Band and Chowder Society Review, Unlimited!!!
Announcer: Will the owner of a Red, Ford Menace, Florida license plate “S-A-T-7-0-0” (pronounce Seven Hundred) please report to the front gate. Your keys are in the ignition.
Announcer: After Florida State’s recent loss to ACC Football Powerhouse UNC, Virginia Fans are reassured that there is now someone who dislikes Ronald Curry and the UNC Tar-heels just as much as we do.
Announcer: The Virginia Pep Band would like to present the Top 10 Reasons to attend Florida State University:
They don’t make you count higher than five.
Alligator soup is served at the dining halls.
Bad grades, no grades, they don’t care about grades!
Florida is the only state where your vote actually matters.
At least it’s not UNC.
Announcer: H to the Iz-O, V to the Iz-Ay? Shizza my Nizza, all the Pep Band has to say is, “Jigga What?”
Announcer: The Virginia Tech Football team has resumed practicing on its football field after determining that the white grainy substance which appeared to have been strategically laid out in lines and numbers on the field was in fact, not anthrax, but simply chalk.
Announcer: Now, to familiarize Florida State fans with our own university, let's compare and contrast UVA with FSU: We're a public University, they're a public University. We have a football team, they have a football team. Our students entered with an average 1310 on the SAT... And they, well, they have a football team.